Power of connecting

There are a few things that have always meant a lot to me.  Helping people.  Realizing that what a person wants might not be what he or she needs.  Striving to do better.  Respecting differences as natural rather than inherently wrong.  Honoring the power of connection, of relationship.

Especially the last.

Alas, Mim was the Lockhart graced with developing & nurturing relationship.  I am very good at connection, which is not the same thing.  

Being there really matters, matters more than we might think.  It's so analog in our digital world, but so priceless.  

Which was one of the things Mim excelled at - lending her quiet, calm presence.  I am anything but quiet & more frenetic than peaceful.  Mim projected a peaceful center.  

I'll never be Mim.  There's already one.  But there are so many ways I can be more engaged in a totally ME way.  Things learned over the past 2+ weeks:

• An e-mail or Facebook connection isn't the same as a phone call. It may seem hopelessly analog in a digital world, but voice connects more than transient words. 
• Instead of saying "Call me if you need to talk," touch base & say, "Hey, was thinking about you.  Got a few moments to talk?"  
• Stock up on Thinking of You cards & use them.  
• Even if you stink at remembering birthdays & anniversaries, take the time every couple months to dash off a note to friends & family who matter most.  Both Mim & Peter are master card note letter writers.  
• Call back.  How I feel about Mim's passing will be different as time goes by.  It's a shock right now.  Later, will hit harder.
• And I'm going to encourage the Pastor's Office to put together a place for names of people who are not well, at home or in the hospital, as well as contact info (if okay) for a call or note.  It makes some people squirm, but a list of people who can use our prayers.  Other churches are SO much better at this than us.

From the cradle to this moment, I've always believed in the power of connecting, of relationship.  People who experience my big smile & Tiggerish attitude don't realize I feel challenged at developing nurturing maintaining them. Am blessed by a few fabulous relationships that feed my soul & fill my heart.  And my John. A couple TLC others.  But I've longed for decades to develop nurture maintain connection through WRITING relationships.  

Writing & receiving letters made a huge difference in Mom's life, in Mim's.  Real letters - ink, pen, envelope, stamp.  The last few years, that's the very sort of relationship I enjoyed with Mim.  Will use that as my starting place.  Ready, set - write!