calling it what it is

It's not negative thinking to call something out as being negative.  That's honesty.  

And when we find excuses for not doing things that will help us without harming others, for procrastinating on things like necessary dental appointments & health care check ups & a stunning number of other things we should be doing & aren't because something inside holds us back - that's not simply normal human behavior easily chalked up to "everyone does it."  It is a particularly pernicious, flies-under-the-radar form of self-loathing.

It is what it is.  Think about its effect, how it makes us feel, the damage that it does.  Clearly, the opposite of self-loving.

My current health issues have me thinking differently about a lot of things, wondering, "Why the heck is a vise-like grip keeping me from doing these core things?"  

That's how it feels - a great huge NO clamping down on sane intentions to act wisely.  Weirdly irrational, setting me up for the consequences of not, to suffer for lack of motivation & movement, with others I care about - ones I typically strive to protect - caught up in it, too.  

That's not a neutral something.  It is hideously active & horribly effective.  It might like to be tagged as "just human nature" or something "everyone does," but am calling it out for the wretched thing it truly is.  Self-loathing.  

Yes, it might well be human nature.  Thank all that is that I am NOT, by my nature, human!