Sunday, June 28, 2015

MIM 06/28/15

Aaarrrrgggghhhhhh!  I so totally messed everything up when I blew it & left Gunny (our beloved if ancient Concorde) running & probably killed its engine, which was billowing smoke & making very ominous noises by the time I finally turned it off.  I messed up everything.

Right now, I should be over in Toms River, at the hospital with Mim rather than just hanging up the phone after a short talk & sketchy update.  She needs an advocate, big time, just like we were for Mom through the years.  And, because of my own stupidity, I'm stuck in Pennsylvania, unable to do anything.

Even the car we'd been lent by remarkably generous friends went on the fritz. As I watched it drive away down Pheasant Run, I crumpled.  

Mim's doctors apparently have indicated that they basically can't do anything, but still want to put her on IV nutrition, which she doesn't want, but she doesn't have the energy to fight for her preference rather than theirs. 

Stupid!  Stupid!  Stupid!  How could I have left the ignition on?  I mean, who does that??  Okay, John reminds me I'd just learned about Mim, but come on - who does that?

Mim needs me & I'm stranded.

And it gets worse - no wheels, no clients.  No clients, no cash.  No cash, no way to pay for even the most optimistic car repair.

Feeling like I let everyone down.  Wait - I did.


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