My sister, Mim, is in the hospital. From what we're hearing, it's very serious. Mim's attitude is upbeat, but her personal outlook for the outcome is grim.
Mim was admitted to the hospital on Tuesday night, through the emergency room. When I learned about it, it struck me as strange that I took it so calmly. Mim is my only sister. For over 1/3 of my life, she was the sun of my solar system. So much of who I am & what I'm accomplishing tracks back to her. So it felt weird to feel so unmoved. Alas, as calm as I felt consciously, my subconscious was flipping out - I left my car running, as I discovered when someone came into where I was having dinner to tell me that smoke was billowing out from under my hood.
So much for not being struck down by the news.
Yesterday (using a borrowed car), John & I headed west to pick up my oldest brother, Peter, who lives about an hour from us, then east to the Toms River, New Jersey hospital where Mim is tucked away.
As I expected, Mim was in exceptionally good spirits, joshing with the staff, smiling & making light of her situation without dismissing it. On the one hand, she looks shocking. On the other hand, there is that familiar inner light, that quick & ready wit, that self-deprecating smile & readiness to look on the brighter side, if there was one.
A biopsy was done on Wednesday; she says it can take seven (7!) days to get results. Seriously?!
Mim doesn't seem to be in a lot of pain, but she'd never let on if she was.
Am kicking myself because I forgot to call her today - was pretty zonked out after yesterday - and won't be going to visit tomorrow, as I'd expected. In addition to being hesitant about putting so many miles on a friend's car, it hit me that it's Sunday, which means shore traffic heading back home. That is NOT something I'm up to handling, no matter whose car I'm driving. So, will satisfy myself with a phone call to Mim & to her friend who's acting as Mim's advocate & hospital liaison.
It's hard to know the best way I can be support to Mim. Being who she is, am sure that she'll let me know if I ask.
I think about how Mim looked when we saw her yesterday. Yes, her body & all the things sticking out of it looked ill. But no one would guess her age by looking at her face, watching her talk. Early thirties - maybe. But 71? No way!
There is not now nor ever has been anyone like my sister. I have no idea what lies ahead, but will do all I can to be what she needs at every turn. It's hard to be without a car, to be stranded on the other side of the Delaware. But it is what it is.
It is what it is - that's what Mim said several times yesterday about her condition. She's been seriously ill before & pulled out of it. Fingers are crossed that it will be the same this time.
My hope is to post something every day on this blog about Mim's condition. Mim's name & the date will be in the subject line, perhaps with more.
Prayers welcome!
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