Gutting through exaggeration

A fascinating experience that's come out of the current hub-bub around the Confederate flag is how many people are responding in ways that are astonishingly similar to my own family's dynamics.

I think about Ashleigh Banfield, suggesting on CNN that if we're taking down Confederate flags, maybe we should tear down the Jefferson Memorial, too.  By exaggerating the argument - equating someone who owned slaves with those who went to war over the right to expand slavery - she took the discussion in a new way.  And invested folks waiting in the wings eagerly jumped on it.  Nine people murdered by someone who said he had to do it because “you rape our women & you’re taking over our country & you have to go” are no longer the issue - liberals out to tear down the Jefferson Memorial is the outcry.  Exaggeration is wildly successful in derailing substantial discussions.

I think about Sean Hannity equating rap music with the Confederate flag.  "We’re in the process of banning everything. Just a thought.”  Hullo - how did lowering & moth balling Confederate flags inflate into "banning everything"?  

Then, there's Bill O'Reilly experiencing criticism of Fox News as just cause for throwing down the gauntlet - "You want a war? You got a war!"  Yowser!  Talk about exaggeration!  

Going back to Ashleigh Banfield's suggestion that perhaps we need to rethink the Jefferson Memorial & its absurd conflating of owning slaves with killing over them - that exaggeration opened the way for Breitbart to report that CNN was "floating a narrative trial balloon for profane ideas."  Because, "CNN is on a frenzied political crusade to spread hate and division."  Nuff said.

 

No one understood the power of exaggeration better than my own dear Mama. Her tried & true response when things came up she didn't want to discuss -  exaggerate the situation beyond recognition.  For years, that stopped discussion in its tracks, stopped it cold.  

And for years, I'd go off rails with her, totally forgetting whatever had been discussed.  It wasn't until I'd dredged up the ability to step back & distance myself, to see the situation, that a solution dawned.  When the WHY behind her derailing by exaggeration became clear - to stop the discussion - the HOW to help restore balance became clear.  Humor.  I'd fold my arms across my chest, saying, "You are the BIGGEST," making a wide circular motion with my arms, "the BADDEST," placing my hands on my hips, "the most NO ACCOUNT Grammie on the face of the Earth!"  She'd crack up with laughter, then we could go on.

That's not likely to work with Hannity, O'Reilly or Banfield.  Certainly not Breitbart.  

Whatever our political stripe, we all need to hone our ability to recognize exaggeration, whether on television or radio or in a discussion, on MSNBC or Fox or CNN or any news outet.  To see it as an attempt to distract derail gut a discussion.  

Turn the channel, return to the original subject, or - if all else fails & if only in your own mind - fold your arms across your chest & say, "You are the BIGGEST..."