Monday, October 12, 2015

"Lord, grant me..."

This is getting spooky familiar - Erik Buss keeps giving sermons which feel tailored for that particular moment in my life.


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Yesterday, it was on how making even a simple change can clear out a path for the Divine's ever-present help in making the deeper changes that are beyond earthly powers.  Right where I am, looking at my beyond-the-beyond cluttered house, a problem that seems to have escalated as I've made once unimaginable strides in other areas of my life.

His talk was a boot to my butt, spurring me to start clearing out.  In just working on one small area, came across drawings of Mim's to incorporate into her online memorial tribute & other well-timed treasures.  And a photocopy of a favorite saying of Mom's, in her writing.

Looking at it, years dropped away.  Was swept with memories of an unforgettable moment, a much-needed lesson learned.   

About fifteen years ago, Mom & I were talking about a challenging situation.  She mentioned it made her think of something that got her through tough times & started quoting, "Lord, grant me..."

I cut her off - yeah, yeah, yeah.  The Serenity Prayer.  Yada yada yada.  

Even as I let loose with my dripping condescension, realized it was plenty high & mighty of me to get snarky about something that meant a lot to Mom.  My sense of personal shabbiness was compounded on learning that was NOT what she was quoting.  

The actual quote captures the woman who started doing an in-depth self-examination at 89 years old; who went from bonding with each of us to being able to step back, to open up a space that allowed her to gain perspective & insight before responding.

Lord, grant me the perception to see the problem,
wisdom to find a solution,
courage to carry it out, 
I pray Thee.


Where Mom found it, I never knew.  But its wisdom & the memory of reacting rather than listening with an attentive heart lights my path. 


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