Seven months ago, I chose to step away from life as It had flowed, took a sabbatical from who knows what. Didn't then, don't now - just went with my gut.
A couple months back, did something else way outside my norm, all because something in my bones said, "Do it." Whenever the spirit moves me, I write four slightly different versions of the same letter; three go to individuals & one to a couple. On lined paper. The stationery doesn't' matter, the connection does.
People think of me as a gregarious person & in many ways I am. But although connecting with people is deeply & joyfully rooted in my nature, for many decades it was smudged out of my nurture. The letters help me reclaim my true self, although I can't for the life of me tell you how.
For years, I'd say in trying to explain some off-kilter trait, "My family told me...". Somewhere around my mid-50s, that changed to, "The message I got...". Nowadays, "It's more to the point - "The noises I hear..."
The older I get, the clearer it becomes that we mish & mangle, all by our little lonesome, so much of what we hear & experience, yet think it's someone else's doing. Once I realized that 99.99999% of the warped messages I've received over 65+ years were warped by ME - well, it was liberating.
Yesterday, when I wrote on another blog that the why behind Cyber Access for the Technically Timid (CATT) was "choice & freedom," something that had been crammed in, stuck down deep inside seemed to take wing & soar upward - released, jubilant.
Just now, did some time travel. Went back 3+ years to March 2014 & my first posting on this very blog. It talked about, after four (4) decades of digging down deep, had finally secured a solid foundation, The next step was figuring out the gnarly task of figuring out how the heck to create craft build a strong & resilient infrastructure.
Up to now, my life has resisted heading in anything close to a linear fashion -YET- it has been steadily leading me to the place moment being where I am capable of thinking & planning & DOING in a linear manner.
Kairos & Kronos continue their dance - for the time being, Kronos has taken the lead. And Kairos couldn't be prouder.
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