As unreasonable as it might seem to others, it IS an issue to me when John asks if he has to shave. And he has at least 1/4" of stubble on his face. And he is going to an art show opening, where I would expect he would want to make his best impression. And we discussed last night, when I said it was fine to go unshaved because we would be with a friend who's practically family BUT that he'd need to shave before heading to Artists Gallery on Saturday.
John likes ME to make his decisions, even when it's clear what the best one is.
As unreasonable at it might seem to others, it IS an issue with me when John doesn't stop doing something that puts me at risk because it's more convenient for him to keep on doing it. This happens a lot. Sometimes in very dire situations. Today, he ran the kitchen spigot for hot water, in spite of knowing I was working with chocolate in the same area & that chocolate does NOT like water. As soon as I realized what was happening, I asked him to turn off the water. He did - after it got to the heat he wanted, not before.
Sorry to all those who say he's just being a guy & that it's unreasonable of me to expect him to think for himself & to be considerate even when it might be inconvenient - I expect better & do take it as a slight when he leaves it to me & puts me at risk.
Didn't get upset, just canceled my plans to go out with him to lunch. That WOULD have been foolish, feeling as I did. I'd say maybe next time he'll realize the consequence of his thoughtlessness, but - alas - it's not likely.
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