Yes, it bugs me when John answers the question, "Where is Sophie?" with "YOU said she was behind the couch," when that was 30 minutes ago & five minutes ago HE said she was in the hat box in the dining room. Yes, it rubs me raw when - - hearing him repeatedly & in some exasperation calling Rennie & Max to their dinner yet suspecting he's HOLDING the dishes, waiting for the cats to arrive, rather than realizing they're in the other room BECAUSE the dishes aren't on the floor - - I ask, "Are they (the dishes) on the floor?" & he swiftly bends down to put Max's on the linoleum as he answers, "Yes, they are."
How can there be any constructive discussion with someone who invariably, as in the case of Sophie, pegs responsibility for the response to me, even though I last spotted her 30 minutes ago while he saw her less than ten minutes past, and who waits until after swiftly doing something before answering a question wondering if it was done? It's how he thinks. Right now, with the cats sick & really needing a second pair of sane, responsible, reliable hands to help feed them all, which is not at all easy, it is a particular challenge.
BUT the fact is that I am the one who gets frustrated at the present moment problem, who tags it back to a long history of similar responses (what a waste of time) & gets stressed, which stresses out the sick kitties, who literally high tail it downstairs to the den where they'll hid under the chairs & behind the couches & next to the tall book case, not eating anything, while Rennie & Max & Sky make a beeline for the abandoned cat food dishes.
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