Matters squat what you want to do, what your loftiest goals may be - without an emotional back bone, they'll go pffffttttt.
That was brought home to me as I slugged my way through the introduction to Regina Leeds book, One Year to an Organized Life. Would that we all permanently internalized & lived her statement, "I want being organized to be a tool in your support arsenal, which might include your spiritual studies, exercise regime, diet, circle of friends & family, even time with a qualified therapist. The world is waiting for the unique contributions you were born to make. Are you ready to create the environment that will support & sustain your best efforts? I wrote this book for you."
Her book was written for someone with a full set of vertebrae. For so long, I had a wish bone where my back bone ought to be. There is something more there now, something finally past the soft bone matter state. Maybe I'm up to a toddler's back bone. Time will tell when I am blessed with a mature spine.
Time & evidence of things done, not just talked about & planned.
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
interesting scenario - broken government
Confession - when I'm clearing & cleaning my present-day Aegean Stable of a house, you'll usually find me with a portable dvd player close by, playing a West Wing episode. This morning, it was one of the best - The Supremes, about the challenges faced by any administration getting Supreme Court justice nominations out of committee, let alone confirmed. Even if the president's party controls the Senate, the opposition has ways to block any action for months, years. It's noteworthy that when Harry Reid restored majority vote, Supreme Court appointments were made an exception.
It got me to thinking about how very broken our government is at this moment in time & no one seems to making a move to right the flagrant wrongs. Conservatives blame liberals, liberals fault conservatives & without enough centrists - yes, particularly on the Republican side of the aisle - we remain at a dangerous standstill.
When George W. Bush was elected by grace of the Supreme Court, Republicans considered he'd received a mandate from the people. Anyone who opposed him was painted as trying to obstruct the will of the people. When Barack Obama was elected - twice - with clear majorities, Republicans painted him as illegitimate, completely ignored the fact that in both elections over 50% of the American public cast their votes for him & not his GOP opponent.
There is a key difference in dynamics that make the current political landscape ungovernable. Polls indicate that a majority of Democrats favor elected official who negotiate & work out compromises. Those same polls find that a majority of Republicans expect elected officials to stand by conservative principles, whatever the cost.
A significant number of conservatives were heart & soul behind Ted Cruz shutting down the government in order to achieve the unachievable because it felt right. An even larger number don't care that the majority of Americans voted for a liberal (true liberals would call centrist) Democrat for president - they would point out that the House is controlled by the GOP & that it is their duty to America to thwart the president to the full extent that they are able.
A majority of Democrats support a president who caves & a majority of Republicans support a House - and as many Senators as possible, certainly all conservatives - who stand by their principles, who consider negotiation anathema & compromise unthinkable. As one Republican congressman said, without any intended humor, compromise is when a Democrat accepts a GOP position.
Interesting scenario.
It got me to thinking about how very broken our government is at this moment in time & no one seems to making a move to right the flagrant wrongs. Conservatives blame liberals, liberals fault conservatives & without enough centrists - yes, particularly on the Republican side of the aisle - we remain at a dangerous standstill.
When George W. Bush was elected by grace of the Supreme Court, Republicans considered he'd received a mandate from the people. Anyone who opposed him was painted as trying to obstruct the will of the people. When Barack Obama was elected - twice - with clear majorities, Republicans painted him as illegitimate, completely ignored the fact that in both elections over 50% of the American public cast their votes for him & not his GOP opponent.
There is a key difference in dynamics that make the current political landscape ungovernable. Polls indicate that a majority of Democrats favor elected official who negotiate & work out compromises. Those same polls find that a majority of Republicans expect elected officials to stand by conservative principles, whatever the cost.
A significant number of conservatives were heart & soul behind Ted Cruz shutting down the government in order to achieve the unachievable because it felt right. An even larger number don't care that the majority of Americans voted for a liberal (true liberals would call centrist) Democrat for president - they would point out that the House is controlled by the GOP & that it is their duty to America to thwart the president to the full extent that they are able.
A majority of Democrats support a president who caves & a majority of Republicans support a House - and as many Senators as possible, certainly all conservatives - who stand by their principles, who consider negotiation anathema & compromise unthinkable. As one Republican congressman said, without any intended humor, compromise is when a Democrat accepts a GOP position.
Interesting scenario.
Tuesday, August 5, 2014
not such wise fools
Here's my experience of
the steps toward the highest form of wisdom - data information knowledge
intelligence understanding perception wisdom intuition. Data may be
first, but it's also least.
In my experience growing up in parochial schools, from kindergarten through college, the emphasis was on learning as much data as possible. There was no space on any curriculum for meditation, not even as an elective.
I think of what a difference developing meditation practices can make in every aspect of a person's life, including the home. I don't understand how any religion can teach the edict of the God of the Old Testament to "Be still & know..." and NOT recognize the importance of meditation, of finding stillness in the midst of whatever is around us, in developing a genuinely spiritual life.
Seems the religion I was born into & embraced throughout my life is another aspect of inverted life practices. The very things that were taught throughout the Old & New Testaments & in the Writings are the same that are shuffed aside in the teaching of them. Even to this day, my church spotlights learning & relearning points of doctrine & ignores the essential value of finding stillness in the midst of life's clutter. And so many American Christians seem to have totally forgotten that Jesus fed the multitudes without payment & gave life-saving free health care. They could do with a little stillness in their lives, a little reflection on what was revealed v. what they teach.
Data information knowledge intelligence understanding perception wisdom intuition. Our tech age takes unimaginable strides expanding the first three. Many people ace the next two. But the final three, especially the last?
In my experience growing up in parochial schools, from kindergarten through college, the emphasis was on learning as much data as possible. There was no space on any curriculum for meditation, not even as an elective.
I think of what a difference developing meditation practices can make in every aspect of a person's life, including the home. I don't understand how any religion can teach the edict of the God of the Old Testament to "Be still & know..." and NOT recognize the importance of meditation, of finding stillness in the midst of whatever is around us, in developing a genuinely spiritual life.
Seems the religion I was born into & embraced throughout my life is another aspect of inverted life practices. The very things that were taught throughout the Old & New Testaments & in the Writings are the same that are shuffed aside in the teaching of them. Even to this day, my church spotlights learning & relearning points of doctrine & ignores the essential value of finding stillness in the midst of life's clutter. And so many American Christians seem to have totally forgotten that Jesus fed the multitudes without payment & gave life-saving free health care. They could do with a little stillness in their lives, a little reflection on what was revealed v. what they teach.
Data information knowledge intelligence understanding perception wisdom intuition. Our tech age takes unimaginable strides expanding the first three. Many people ace the next two. But the final three, especially the last?
(cross-posted from secretsofthehome.blogspot.com)
Monday, August 4, 2014
carve out
Saying it AGAIN - the way for me to get done the things that shout to be done is to carve out blocks of dedicated time to work on them.
Remember what one of the Omega workshop presenters suggested - imagine how I will feel the day AFTER getting parts of the house truly clean & lovely. Imagine my feelings the day AFTER getting the first floor completed. Imagine after the first AND second floors are beautiful & orderly & clean. Imagine my feelings the day after I show off the welcoming basement to John, the day after the garage is cleared out & fun walkways for the cats have been set up. Imagine my feelings the day after the master bedroom & bath are finally put to rights, the master closet is in apple pie order, the attic is reordered.
It starts with fully imagining how it will feel the day after I successfully carve out a block of time & spend it efficiently getting a designated part of the house looking the way it deserves - orderly, attractive, welcoming. Then, repeat.
Remember what one of the Omega workshop presenters suggested - imagine how I will feel the day AFTER getting parts of the house truly clean & lovely. Imagine my feelings the day AFTER getting the first floor completed. Imagine after the first AND second floors are beautiful & orderly & clean. Imagine my feelings the day after I show off the welcoming basement to John, the day after the garage is cleared out & fun walkways for the cats have been set up. Imagine my feelings the day after the master bedroom & bath are finally put to rights, the master closet is in apple pie order, the attic is reordered.
It starts with fully imagining how it will feel the day after I successfully carve out a block of time & spend it efficiently getting a designated part of the house looking the way it deserves - orderly, attractive, welcoming. Then, repeat.
one singular sensation
The #1 thing that came from experiencing Omega is the certainty we are born to have the incredible be part of every day. What we take to be extraordinary, even downright magical, is simply how life is meant to work.
So many people treat the fantastic in our lives as utterly outside the norm. So many keep eyes wide shut against seeing the spectacle of sensational things people moments happening in every 24 hours.
Yesterday, I had a singular experience at the last Omega workshop. Literally indescribable. Interesting that at the start of the exercise, I was one of three people who felt totally unengaged. Within a few moments, I came up with a starting place. Within moments of that, was at the meant-to-be place.
Wondering... If I'd been unsettled when a moment didn't come to me right off the bat, if I'd dredged up something artificial rather than admitting nothing came to me, if I hadn't been at peace being where I was, no matter how different that was from most, maybe the process would have turned out equally as phony.
The think I remember most from the had-to-be-there experience was my immediate response at the close - I was rocked with laughter. Wonderful, delightful rollicking laughter. So NOT expected, yet so right.
Is my life filled with magic? Someone looking at it might conclude it is. To me, magic is the sensation we get when things go the way they were designed. Fairy godmothers are famous for making things work out, for coming up with exceptional outcomes. When we each become the fairy godmother of our own life, its filled with singular sensations of wonder & amazement & awe.
So many people treat the fantastic in our lives as utterly outside the norm. So many keep eyes wide shut against seeing the spectacle of sensational things people moments happening in every 24 hours.
Yesterday, I had a singular experience at the last Omega workshop. Literally indescribable. Interesting that at the start of the exercise, I was one of three people who felt totally unengaged. Within a few moments, I came up with a starting place. Within moments of that, was at the meant-to-be place.
Wondering... If I'd been unsettled when a moment didn't come to me right off the bat, if I'd dredged up something artificial rather than admitting nothing came to me, if I hadn't been at peace being where I was, no matter how different that was from most, maybe the process would have turned out equally as phony.
The think I remember most from the had-to-be-there experience was my immediate response at the close - I was rocked with laughter. Wonderful, delightful rollicking laughter. So NOT expected, yet so right.
Is my life filled with magic? Someone looking at it might conclude it is. To me, magic is the sensation we get when things go the way they were designed. Fairy godmothers are famous for making things work out, for coming up with exceptional outcomes. When we each become the fairy godmother of our own life, its filled with singular sensations of wonder & amazement & awe.
power of a single word
For well over two
decades, I've been awed by the power of words. In particular, the power
of a single word. Over the past twenty-some years - aka after getting
married - I've developed a particular habit that continues to stand me
in truly incredible good stead. I single out an admirable quality to
cultivate.
The first was effectiveness, a quality that felt sorely lacking in my life. It took being stunned with my company's Employee of the Year award (complete with $1000 check & a bauble from Tiffany) to figure out that it had fully taken root & blossomed. Still amazes. Me? Out of 1600 very talented employees, many downright brilliant? I wasn't exceptional, just did what needed to be done. Who knew it would be experienced by the folks I worked with & for as exceptional. Yup, focusing on everyday effectiveness paid off in ways I never imagined.
Next up was alignment. No one knew more than I that my life was out of alignment. That was how my family rolled - alignment was a foreign idea, especially after Dad died. Not exaggerating to say the family norm was for up to pass for down, in for out, black for white. Having John in my life helped me discover the inversion & comprehend how it worked against me. Having nailed effectiveness, my attention turned to alignment. Can't say I've reached the same success, but am considerably improved. At least I can say it has taken root & that I work every day to develop it more fully.
The most recent spotlighted word is equanimity. It far from full blossom, but am amazed at how deeply rooted it's become over the years, how often I experience the emotional & spiritual benefits of its shelter.
Those are the three qualities I've focused on over the past 20+ years - effectiveness, alignment, equanimity. Writing this, it strikes me that equanimity built off of alignment, which built off of effectiveness. Just as a person can't experience interdependence without first achieving genuine independence, perhaps equanimity wasn't possible without working on the first two.
Sigh... No one knows better than I the difficulties that arise from lack of accessible balance & perspective. If only I'd had even a smidgen of equanimity when Mom was still alive.
For older friends, equanimity is a priceless part of their tool kit for dealing with the challenges associated with aging. Ditto for anyone touching their lives. What a great sadness it took me until after Mom passed to develop it.
From the vantage point of 62, it's clear that one of the greatest gifts I could have given my younger self was a sense of equanimity. It's astonishing how much easier life has gotten since it's taken deeper & deeper root. There's no better goad for further nurturing it than when I get unhinged by a situation, which I now experience as a dark, oppressive force crushing ME.
The power of a single word. Think about it. Imagine if every year, all of us focused on one quality we wanted to cultivate in our lives. Imagine if everyone with children or older relatives, bosses or associates decided to nurture equanimity.
It took being at Omega to realize that yoga is far from the only practice to single out equanimity as THE essential quality to develop in our lives. Hinduism, Buddhism, Judaism, Christianity, Baha'i, even Stoicism - all extoll equanimity as the essential quality for understanding what is real, for "seeing" what is divine. None of them say it is easy, just essential.
There is great power in a single word, but perhaps no word is more powerful, provides greater gifts to our self & others, than equanimity. Back when I first pondered the possibility that focusing on a particular quality might help open a way for it to take root in my life, had NO idea it would lead to a better way to be a marriage partner, a more effective grannie listener, a more receptive & helpful friend.
Don't need to single out the quality blessed - I am & I know it!
(cross-post from thegrannielistener.blogspot.com)
The first was effectiveness, a quality that felt sorely lacking in my life. It took being stunned with my company's Employee of the Year award (complete with $1000 check & a bauble from Tiffany) to figure out that it had fully taken root & blossomed. Still amazes. Me? Out of 1600 very talented employees, many downright brilliant? I wasn't exceptional, just did what needed to be done. Who knew it would be experienced by the folks I worked with & for as exceptional. Yup, focusing on everyday effectiveness paid off in ways I never imagined.
Next up was alignment. No one knew more than I that my life was out of alignment. That was how my family rolled - alignment was a foreign idea, especially after Dad died. Not exaggerating to say the family norm was for up to pass for down, in for out, black for white. Having John in my life helped me discover the inversion & comprehend how it worked against me. Having nailed effectiveness, my attention turned to alignment. Can't say I've reached the same success, but am considerably improved. At least I can say it has taken root & that I work every day to develop it more fully.
The most recent spotlighted word is equanimity. It far from full blossom, but am amazed at how deeply rooted it's become over the years, how often I experience the emotional & spiritual benefits of its shelter.
Those are the three qualities I've focused on over the past 20+ years - effectiveness, alignment, equanimity. Writing this, it strikes me that equanimity built off of alignment, which built off of effectiveness. Just as a person can't experience interdependence without first achieving genuine independence, perhaps equanimity wasn't possible without working on the first two.
Sigh... No one knows better than I the difficulties that arise from lack of accessible balance & perspective. If only I'd had even a smidgen of equanimity when Mom was still alive.
For older friends, equanimity is a priceless part of their tool kit for dealing with the challenges associated with aging. Ditto for anyone touching their lives. What a great sadness it took me until after Mom passed to develop it.
From the vantage point of 62, it's clear that one of the greatest gifts I could have given my younger self was a sense of equanimity. It's astonishing how much easier life has gotten since it's taken deeper & deeper root. There's no better goad for further nurturing it than when I get unhinged by a situation, which I now experience as a dark, oppressive force crushing ME.
The power of a single word. Think about it. Imagine if every year, all of us focused on one quality we wanted to cultivate in our lives. Imagine if everyone with children or older relatives, bosses or associates decided to nurture equanimity.
It took being at Omega to realize that yoga is far from the only practice to single out equanimity as THE essential quality to develop in our lives. Hinduism, Buddhism, Judaism, Christianity, Baha'i, even Stoicism - all extoll equanimity as the essential quality for understanding what is real, for "seeing" what is divine. None of them say it is easy, just essential.
There is great power in a single word, but perhaps no word is more powerful, provides greater gifts to our self & others, than equanimity. Back when I first pondered the possibility that focusing on a particular quality might help open a way for it to take root in my life, had NO idea it would lead to a better way to be a marriage partner, a more effective grannie listener, a more receptive & helpful friend.
Don't need to single out the quality blessed - I am & I know it!
(cross-post from thegrannielistener.blogspot.com)
Friday, August 1, 2014
paws on floor
As I took two loose-fitting, just-right-for-Omega tops into the front room to pack, I heard the sound of paws running toward the room. Looking down, it was the soft, long red stripes of Rennie, not the short ones of Gryff. Was suddenly overwhelmed with the realization of how many days it's been since Gryff begged "more please," running up to the room, dashing across & up to HIS special place. How wonderful it will be to have him back to his sweetly demanding self.
This morning, he wasn't behind the couch. Our hearts stood still until we found him, curled up under the end table. I held my breath as I put an outstretched hand on his fur - he didn't stir, but there was a faint warmth as I lightly stroked his body, paying special attention to his head. This is a lad who LOVES to be held & stroked & loved.
As I picked him up, he became slightly more attentive. John stood by me & showered loving attentions on our boy of boys. Gryff seemed to be finally coming around, shifting in my arms. When I put him down, he headed toward the kitchen. Have never been so happy to hear paws on linoleum floor!
Praise be, Gryff ate some breakfast & took some water. John & I will give him his a.m. meds just before I head out.
It will be harder than John can imagine to relinquish MY role of holding that beloved cat - so small compared to the "Big Red" who first & forever stole our hearts - and giving Gryff his tiny pill. Am always aware of the blessing of our daily communion - a tender rapport. Alas, reason wins out - the Keetmeister has to do it tonight through Sunday morning, so needs the practice.
Whatever happens over the next days, Gryff only knows love & deep appreciation with us. He might need to beg "more food, please," but that short-haired red tabby is always full up with love.
UPDATE 08/04/14 - John went to the vet for special cat food. Gryff did an almost immediate turn around. When I arrived home last night, HE was one of the cats greeting me at the door! Amazed tonight to see him dash into the front room for his supper, then to chomp down the vittles!
This morning, he wasn't behind the couch. Our hearts stood still until we found him, curled up under the end table. I held my breath as I put an outstretched hand on his fur - he didn't stir, but there was a faint warmth as I lightly stroked his body, paying special attention to his head. This is a lad who LOVES to be held & stroked & loved.
As I picked him up, he became slightly more attentive. John stood by me & showered loving attentions on our boy of boys. Gryff seemed to be finally coming around, shifting in my arms. When I put him down, he headed toward the kitchen. Have never been so happy to hear paws on linoleum floor!
Praise be, Gryff ate some breakfast & took some water. John & I will give him his a.m. meds just before I head out.
It will be harder than John can imagine to relinquish MY role of holding that beloved cat - so small compared to the "Big Red" who first & forever stole our hearts - and giving Gryff his tiny pill. Am always aware of the blessing of our daily communion - a tender rapport. Alas, reason wins out - the Keetmeister has to do it tonight through Sunday morning, so needs the practice.
Whatever happens over the next days, Gryff only knows love & deep appreciation with us. He might need to beg "more food, please," but that short-haired red tabby is always full up with love.
UPDATE 08/04/14 - John went to the vet for special cat food. Gryff did an almost immediate turn around. When I arrived home last night, HE was one of the cats greeting me at the door! Amazed tonight to see him dash into the front room for his supper, then to chomp down the vittles!
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